I am worn out!

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I am worn out!

Post by thebigscott on Sat May 22, 2010 6:28 pm

We're trying to clean house for Caly's birthday party next weekend. Because of having our basement flood, we've spent the last week and a half cleaning up that mess and ignoring the day to day housework that needs to be done. So Scott took the little ones to his mom's house for the weekend while the bigger ones and I cleaned up.

I'm trying to get the kids to understand that sweeping everything into a big pile and putting 'most' of the stuff away won't work. They are good workers most of the time, but if you don't stay with them and make them completely finish a task, they get 85% of the way through it and quit. And of course that doesn't work at all. That 15% that doesn't get put away gets scattered and you end up having to do the whole job over again.

And of course I had to go run several errands today. I left the kids at home to keep working while I was out. I had to drop off some kittens at the pet store (they're ready to give away and the pet store will take them and sell them), drop off some clothes at Goodwill, then go to Wal-mart and to Krogers. Three of those places are right next to each other, but Krogers is in the next town over. I normally don't make a special trip, but they had several things on sale that we use frequently and they had whole boneless sirloin tips for $2.30 a pound. That's about the price of hamburger at lot of times so it's worth a trip to buy one or two and have them cut into steaks that I can freeze. I'm thinking I'll go back tomorrow and get more. I have a coupon for $5 off $50 that can't be used until tomorrow. If I have any errands at all that direction I'll stop in and pick up another two.

When I got back home I could tell that the kids had done a little work, but only a little. They have the ability to look right at a mess and just not see it. They think they're getting a lot done, but I don't count it as cleaning if you take a mess and just move it to a new location. So I need to get some dinner and then get them back to work to actually finish all the small jobs they started and abandoned.

I really want to get as much done tonight as possible so we can take the afternoon and evening off tomorrow and relax.
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by KellyM on Sat May 22, 2010 6:53 pm

Sounds like you had a busy day, hope you have an uneventful and relaxing day tomorrow.. Smile
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by bizzeedee on Sat May 22, 2010 7:27 pm

kids are like men... their standard of clean is non-existent LOL Be proud that you at least have kids that understand your need for help... sometimes we have to lower our standard of clean... at least that's what I've learned over the years with Chuck.... spots of the mirrror? no big deal, hair on the bathroom floor no big deal? nada, coffee stains in the kitchen sink? so what? but a piece of brown edged lettuce in the salad... call the medics LOL
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by thebigscott on Sun May 23, 2010 9:14 pm

I'm not the kind to get worked up over spots on the mirror or stains in the sink. I sometimes wish I was. My problem with the kids is that they will literally sweep the floor and then leave the pile of swept up stuff right in the middle of the floor, or they will load the dishwasher in the morning and tell me they did the dishes, only when I open it at lunchtime to get a clean cup I discover that they never actually turned it on. They are great kids, but they don't understand follow through.

Today we cleaned the porch and bleached the concrete. It was nasty because my dog has puppies and they hang out by the front door and pee there. Yuck! Not what I want I want to greet company with!

Then I made them finish up all the jobs they started yesterday. I didn't ask them to start any new jobs, just to finish the jobs they'd already started and then put all their supplies away. If they swept, I made them clean up the pile and then put the broom and dustpan away. If they washed laundry, I made them fold it, and put it in the dresser rather than leave it unfolded on the sofa.

The house isn't as nice as I'd like, but at least you can walk through it without walking through a pile of swept up cheerios.
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by chelle on Sun May 23, 2010 9:55 pm

Karen, mine are the same way and it drives me BONKERS. of course, they wont sweep UNDER the cabinets or the table either, and leave the pile and the broom right there.

and I especially love them changing Bow and leaving the diaper int he floor, or worse, getting a garbage bag, walking around and picking up garbage, then throwing the bag down.

Drives me NUTS.

I hope you can get it all picked up, I hate trying to do anything with out other things being done.

I need to get my house clean, so we can clean out the storage building. but I get it clean and it lasts about 3 hours. thats it.

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Re: I am worn out!

Post by edbson on Mon May 24, 2010 12:17 am

Mine have learned to follow thru, or redo it entirely. I will dump an entire dresser of drawers on the floor if the clothes are just stuffed, and I will make them resweep and mop if the leave something undone. They learn quick when you are dumping stuff out before they can go somewhere, or in front of friends........I have issues though. Spots on a mirror or a stain in the sink would make me nuts( read batshit crazy), and if not me, then Dh, he is almost as bad of a neat freak as I am, but in a different way. He is a neat freak, I am a germophobe.

I only have one kid here though, and Xander alot, but he picks up after himself, so I have it kinda easy...it kinda stays clean, but I also spend 4-5 hours a day cleaning. I WILL clean the entire wall if i see a spot , but I could care less if the laundry is piled on the loveseat........it's weird

i KNOW I have OCD, I refuse to take meds for it since they make you feel like crap. I will just clean ....i figure it is better than other issues I could have.

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Re: I am worn out!

Post by thebigscott on Mon May 24, 2010 1:01 am

I have mixed feelings about it all. On the one hand, it drives me nuts to have someone sweep a pile of trash right into everyone's way. I'd rather have it under the sofa than right in the middle of the room! But on the other hand, I'm well aware that Zaven and Caly are good kids who don't drink, do drugs, skip school, etc. They usually aren't the ones making the mess (their little brother takes care of that with help from his dad). And they ARE helping.

I just wish for their own sake as much as mine that they'd learn that close isn't the same as done and that when you quit before you're done you typically lose all the work you just did. If you pay almost all your insurance bill, you don't get insurance. If you mostly pay your taxes, you can still go to jail for it. If you go to work 90% of the time you're supposed to, you get fired. And I don't even want to think about the consequences of usually taking your birth control pills or frequently having a designated driver for nights that you're drinking.

Right now the way I'm handling it is to just not let them start something fun until they finish the chore. Caly has been wanting to have a friend spend the night for months, but she can't because the rule is that her room has to be clean. She'll get it most of the way done. But then there'll be something she did not quite finish. Typically, it's sorting through her clothes to see what's too small, the wrong season, etc. So she leaves them out on her bed, then they get moved to the floor because she needs to go to bed. Then she'll walk right through the pile in the morning, or shove it out of the way (which means under her bed where she forgot to sweep). By the time she's ready to start back on the job, they've all got to be rewashed, dried, and folded. So she just made hours more work for herself. And when that's finally done and they're ready to sort... she'll be tired and quit and the same thing will happen again. So even though she's not 'grounded', she still can't have a friend over because the stupid job is still there.

She's also bad about dragging everything out so that the simplest task takes all day. It drives me nuts. But I've started to have to say that she'll work X amount of time and not let her stop even to pee until that time is over. If I don't, she'll go pee, then get a drink, then start watching a movie while she finishes her drink, then she'll get hungry and want a snack, then decide the snack isn't enough and fix a sandwich... and before you know it, it's bedtime and she hasn't done squat.

Zaven is not so bad. He's not the most productive helper in the world, but not quite so bad as Caly. His problem is not that he quits and doesn't do anything. It's that he jumps to another job before the first is completed. So he ends up with 3 or 4 or more half finished jobs and nothing actually completed. But at least he does go to another job and not just start goofing off.
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by edbson on Mon May 24, 2010 9:21 am

Bay does the same thing, she has to clean her room on Saturdays. I can ignore it most of the week, but by Sat. I am breaking out in a cold sweat. She cannot have friends over if it is a mess, or go anywhere fun,or do anything. She missed a shopping trip with my cousin last week, and missed having a friend over also. She is figuring out that haflway is not the entire way, and I will do it for her, but she won't like the results.

I think something clicked this weekend when I mentioned that Xander even picks up the crap he sweeps, and puts it in the trash. ( he has a broom and dustpan, and will tear up paper, or throw stuff on the floor just so he can sweep it.)

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Re: I am worn out!

Post by Lori on Mon May 24, 2010 9:39 am

I have one who would regularly clean his room, but his preferred method was putting stuff in a box and putting it in the basement. The other one does not even seem to recognize a mess even when it's up to his chin. At least it seems that way to me. I'm hit or miss, but mostly keep up on things. I can remeber not being able to get into bed at night unless the bed was made. I started making my bed when I was quite young, not because anyone made me do it but because it didn't feel right unless I did it.

I can always use help sweeping, so Xander can visit any time he wants.

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Re: I am worn out!

Post by bizzeedee on Mon May 24, 2010 8:02 pm

Aaaah not being a mother of youngins is such a pleasure! Remember the good with the bad, someday, they'll be gone...
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Re: I am worn out!

Post by chelle on Wed May 26, 2010 10:50 am

Mine are awful about their rooms. and piling up clean clothes, then them hitting the floor, then... of course, more laundry.

And not wiping down counters, or anything like that.

OH and the trash. taking out the trash. thats a BIG one. and yes, when it gets full and I nicely say "wish someone would take out the trash" and it doesnt get done, the next tiem I walk by, I dump it in the floor. no matter what is in it.

Then theyhave to sweep and mop. and usually sweep and mop about 8 times.

but we are really SOO busy, that its hard to get stuff done and done right. We dont GO anywhere, but we are always working on something. mending fence, watering gardens, hoeing, watering stock. There are a thousand things to do, and I let some stuff slide.

and I dont have a single kid who wants something clean. Seeing a peice of paper laying on the floor drives me batty, but they can walk over it all day.

BR can to. and they dont understand WHY I want it put up. or if theyw ould just pick up after themselves it would be sooo much easier.

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